A Change for the Better
by Cat-Hattin
Summary: Set after Euphoria. Cameron’s had enough of being everyone’s whipping boy. HouseCameron.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Cameron entered her apartment, throwing her bag to the floor. The first thing she did was change into her comfort clothes - big, warm and well-worn. Then she got a tub of ice cream from the freezer, turned the TV on to some pointless music channel and curled up on the sofa, opening the ice cream and tucking in.

Work was growing unbearable and she was beginning to feel like she'd had enough, that it was time to move on. Today had been particularly bad. She should have known when someone ran into the back of her car on the way to work that things were not going to improve. There wasn't a huge amount of damage but getting his insurance details had taken time, then someone had called the police, delaying her further as she gave a statement to them.

At work, House had berated her for being late and when she's told him she'd been in an accident he'd just asked if she was hurt. When she said no, he told her to watch where she was going next time.

With no cases, she'd begun research for a new article - an article that House no doubt would forget to sign off on - but the real trouble had come when a patient she'd seen in the clinic the week before for stress was rushed in after a heart attack.

Even now, Cameron believed she'd done everything by the book. She's prescribed anti-depressants, advised him to take a vacation then try to cut back on his working hours, and finally, she had referred him to a psychiatrist. He hadn't had time to fill the prescription and hadn't taken her advice. According to House this was her fault for not stressing the risks to his health enough.

Of course, she had defended her corner but as usual, House had the last word. She'd missed Foreman then, he would have defended her position. Chase, for the nice guy he was, was too weak to stand up for her, especially with House in such a bad mood.

House wasn't holding back on any barbs about Foreman either. If she was such a trusting person, maybe she should have trusted him, House, more and then Foreman wouldn't have had his "brain scrambled unnecessarily" and maybe she should consider a career as a vet because "there are less law suits when you brain damage a dog".

After work she'd gone to see Foreman, who was sleeping. The nurse told her he'd had a tough day. The disease had rampaged through his body while the biopsy rewired his brain. He was finding it hard to cope with the coordination problems and physical therapy.

The nurse had suggested waking him up, saying she was sure he'd be pleased to see a friend. Cameron had declined. She wasn't a friend, she was the person who'd done this to him, or at least part of it. And if she was brutally honest, she didn't want to face him after the day she'd had.

She wondered how the others put up with House and his comments. Foreman fought back and didn't take it personally. Chase just let it roll over him. But maybe being men it was easier for them.

Cuddy was the only person she could really ask, but after her comments over Foreman she didn't think she could just call up for a girlie chat and advice on why Cuddy didn't take House's comments personally. Maybe it was just that she had worked with House for years and she'd built up a thicker skin.

The relationship was different too. Cuddy was House's boss, but House was Cameron's boss; House could fire her but not Cuddy.

Cameron wondered if she'd ever become that indifferent. Maybe in a few more years, she thought. But then, it had already been two years and he could hurt her just as much now as at the beginning.

And none of this would hurt as much if she didn't admire House so much. He was the most brilliant doctor she'd ever met. And most of the time his actions were just honest, and did more good than harm overall.

She just needed to become tougher, take things less personally and make herself less of an easy target.

Cameron put the ice cream down, picked the phone up and dialled Jessica Alderson, her old college room mate.

"Hello."

"Hey, Jess."

"Allison? Is that you?"

"It's me."

"Long time, no speak. How are you?"

"I… I'm fine, I just wondered…"

"Stop hesitating and ask me. Worst I can say is no."

"OK. Please don't take this the wrong way but I want your help. I want you to teach me to be more… like you."

Her friend laughed. "You mean a bitch?"

"No, no…"

"Yes, you did. Don't worry. I'm a lawyer, it's a compliment to me. Come on over this weekend, I'll see what I can do with you."

They continued chatting for a few minutes longer before Cameron hung up the phone. She and Jess had always been chalk and cheese, but somehow they'd become friends, if not bosom buddies. Jess was the closest thing she knew to a female House, she didn't mince her words, didn't take any crap or excuses and somehow managed to win every argument she entered into. If anyone could help Cameron, Jess could.

III

House walked into the Diagnostics Office to see Chase filling in the crossword.

"Four down is incumbent," he said, heading to the coffee pot. Chase filled in four down as House asked, "Where's Cameron?"

"Dunno. Haven't seen her yet."

House frowned. Cameron wasn't the type to be late, especially twice in under two weeks.

"Maybe she's getting her car fixed?" Chase suggested.

House grunted and threw a folder at him. "New case," he said, opening his Vicodin and swallowing one.

Chase looked around like a deer caught in the headlights. There was safety in numbers, and he didn't like the idea of working alone with House.

"Forty-five year old male, schoolteacher, presents with fever, fatigue…"

"Shouldn't I try and find Cameron first?"

"Difficulty swallowing and seizures." House closed the file and threw it on the table as he began to write the symptoms on the white board. "Differential diagnosis?"

"Um… infection?"

"Which one?"

"Encephalitis?"

"Already tested for it. Clean."

They both looked up as Cameron came in. Chase was speechless for a moment. She looked totally different, but aside from her hair being up, he couldn't really say what was different.

House could have listed the differences, but then, he paid more attention. Her suit was black, sharp and expensive, and she wore a turtleneck sweater rather than a blouse. Her makeup was slightly darker, her posture taller than usual and she was wearing heels.

"Cameron, thank you for joining us, eventually."

"You're welcome," she said simply, pulling the file House had thrown onto the table over to her and sitting down to read it.

"What, no excuses? No apologies?"

Cameron looked up. "Aren't you the one who says never apologise, never explain?"

"That only works when you're the boss."

"Okay. My alarm didn't go off then."

House glared at her.

"And I'm sorry," she said without sincerity. "Can we…" she pointed at the file.

House turned back to the board and finished writing the symptoms, no longer frowning but scowling.

"Ideas?" he asked.

"Drugs," said Cameron.

"Tox screen was clean," said Chase.

"They don't test for everything," replied Cameron.

"He says he's not on any drugs," said House. "Aren't you usually the one who believes patients?"

"People lie."

"Fine, get another tox screen," he told them, heading into the hallway.

"Where are you going?" asked Chase.

"You seem to have this covered, let me know when the tox screen comes back negative and we'll go from there. Maybe do another brain biopsy, eh Cameron?" He didn't wait for an answer.

"But if you don't think…" Chase began, but House was gone.

Chase looked from House's retreating form to Cameron who was back reading the chart.

"What was that about?"

"What?"

"You." When she looked blankly at him, he continued. "Pissing House off."

"House doesn't play well with others. It's not my problem."

III

Cameron inwardly breathed a sigh of relief as House left. That had gone well, but she'd been nervous as hell walking in here. Especially late.

She's spent the weekend with Jess in the end as Jess said she needed so much work. First they'd done wardrobe. Her neutral colours were out. In were bold block colours. Jess had donated a few of her own, lesser worn outfits and they'd taken a brief shopping trip for a few more.

Next had been hair. Sharp, Jess said, but not too severe. Jess had looked a few styles up on the internet with directions on how to do them and gave them to Cameron.

Then came roleplay. Just like when she prepped a witness, Jess did her research, asking for common situations, examples of House's jibes and his general character and mannerisms. Then she wrote a list of retorts for Cameron to use and, taking on the House role, began testing her, coaching Cameron to make her replies more glib, sarcastic or disinterested.

By Sunday night Cameron was tired but pleased. During the last hour especially, the retorts flowed much more freely, almost naturally, off her tongue.

Her only doubt was if she'd be able to look into House's eyes, close herself off from the pain she saw in them and actively try to hurt him.

It was round one to Cameron, but she wondered if she'd be able to keep it up.

III

"She's being a bitch."

"You must be rubbing off on her."

"Oh," House grabbed his chest in mock pain, "you're so cutting."

"What did you expect? That she'd say thanks for all your sarcasm?"

"It's not like her." House popped open his Vicodin and swallowed two.

"To be honest I'm not surprised she snapped," Wilson said calmly. "You've been riding her too hard and she's been through a tough time."

"Not as tough as Foreman."

"No, but don't forget she thought she could have it too for a while. Foreman isn't an angel. She did what she thought was best and now, not only is she torturing herself, you're torturing her too."

"It's what I do best."

"What were you hoping would happen? Wait, let me see. You were hoping she'd say she was sorry, that she should have trusted you to find the cause and risk killing foreman."

"She left him brain damaged."

"You saw the choice as brain damage or death. Cameron saw it as life or death. She chose life. I would have done the same thing in her position."

House remained silent.

"Or maybe this isn't about Foreman and Cameron at all." Wilson said, leaning forward. "This is about Stacy. She chose life for you, leaving you disabled."

"This has nothing to do with Stacy."

"No?"

"No. She's out of my life."

"Yes, she is. You sent her away. Why? Because you haven't forgiven her."

"Forgiveness is overrated."

"And now you're taking your anger out on Cameron instead."

"I am not taking anything out on Cameron."

"You keep telling yourself that. One day you might actually believe it."

"Thanks, Doctor Freud," he said, rising from his chair. "If we're done with the psychoanalysis, can I go now?"

"Not before you admit you want to sleep with your mom and kill your dad."

"My mom? Nah," he said, heading for the door. "Now your mother - there's a woman I could bang." House ducked out of the door as a good-natured paper ball headed towards him.

As he walked away, he tried to dismiss Wilson's words but found they kept bugging him. Perhaps there was some truth in what he said.

III

House stopped outside the patient's room and saw Cameron beside the bed taking a history. She didn't see him, so he kept silent and listened.

"I've had chest pain on and off for a few years."

"Any problems with your ears?"

"I get a lot of ear infections. My doc gives me antibiotics each time."

"Do they work?"

"Sometimes."

"Do you have pain anywhere else you haven't told me about?"

"Well, down here," the patient pointed to his sternum. "But I assumed that was related to the chest pain."

House walked away. She seemed almost normal with the patients, if a little colder than usual.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

He walked into the diagnostics room to see Chase sitting alone, still doing the crossword.

"What, no work?"

"Waiting on test results, but it doesn't look like a virus."

"So, why aren't you researching other possibilities?"

"Why aren't you?"

"I'm the big boss man, I get to slack, you don't. Where's Cameron?"

"Waiting for the patient's medical history to be faxed over."

"Why aren't you waiting with her?"

"She's as prickly as a porcupine today," he said, shrugging. House stared piercingly at him. "She told me to leave her alone, said I was irritating her."

House nodded, opening the Vicodin and taking one. "Send her through to me when she comes in."

III

House was listening to his iPod when Cameron walked in a few hours later.

"Well well, extreme makeover chick is back," he said. "Didn't happen to get a boob job over the weekend too, did ya?"

"Don't need one." She surprised herself with how easily that slipped out.

"That's a matter of opinion."

She threw the patient file on his desk. "He has Relapsing Polychondritis."

"He does?"

"I reviewed his medical history; it's the only thing to explain all his symptoms."

"What about Polyarteritis Nodosa or Reiter's Syndrome or Cogan Syndrome."

"I'm the immunologist."

House smiled coldly. "But there's no test for Relapsing Polychondritis, how can you be sure?"

"I'm sure."

"Well, OK then. I'll trust you, after what you did to Forman. Refer him to a Rheumatologist then bring me the forms to sign off on him."

"I will." She turned to leave.

"Wait." She stopped but didn't turn around. "Look at me." Slowly she turned to face him. He walked over to her. "You aren't calling the shots any more, that's my job." His tone was icy.

"You're invading my personal space," she told him. "Back off."

"Yeah, I'm scared. You gonna sue me?" Cameron tried her hardest to look impassive. "Now, give me the file, then go wipe the crap off your face, take your hair down and stop playing dress up. Mommy's clothes look ridiculous on you."

He held his hand out for the file and Cameron's brilliant scripted replies all deserted her. She handed him the file, then, willing herself not to go too fast, walked from his office.

House sat back behind his desk. "Say it," he told Chase who was now standing in the doorway connecting the rooms.

"OK, you're an arsehole. You know she's right."

"Do I? And when did you discover this gift for mind reading?"

"Right about the time you became a real jerk."

"That would be, as opposed to a wannabe jerk?"

Chase walked out. House would never admit he was wrong.

III

Cameron locked herself in the stall and let her tears flow. If anything, her cunning plan had made him hate her more and made her life harder. She'd been hoping to impress him with her diagnosis, which was correct - she'd stake her career on that - but he'd had to undermine her once again.

She didn't know how long she'd been in there when he spoke.

"You do know mean girls don't cry, don't you?" he said softly. "Well, it's "big girls" really, but I thought that might sound insulting."

Cameron sat up and dried her eyes. Trying to keep her voice normal she said, "This is the ladies' room, House."

"It is?"

"Please, leave me alone."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I can't."

"So your abuse is pathological now?"

She heard him sigh.

Steeling herself, she stood up and opened the door, praying she didn't look awful or have puffy eyes or something. Her arms crossed across her body, she walked over to him, by the sinks.

"I shouldn't have said those things," he told her, looking deeply into her eyes.

She shook her head.

"Hey, I'm trying to apologise here."

"No, you're not. You said you shouldn't have done something. Well there's a lot of things you shouldn't have done, and probably not one of them that you're sorry about."

"I am sorry if I hurt you."

"You know you hurt me, you meant to."

"I know."

Cameron looked into his eyes as though trying to see some truth there.

"You forgave Foreman. Or do I have to be dying before you forgive me, too?" he asked, teasingly.

Finally Cameron broke into a small smile. "No."

They stared into each other's eyes for a few moments, Cameron wondering why she forgave everyone, but especially House, so easily, House knowing he was on dangerous ground and needed to leave soon.

"So," he said, moving away slightly, "What's with the new getup?"

"What? You're always telling me to toughen up, live in the real world."

"Yeah, but I don't mean it." He reached behind her and began removing the clips from her hair. Cameron hissed as he pulled too hard on one clip.

"Oww!"

"Quit whining." He told her before continuing. "You're you, that's who you need to be."

"Why?"

"You act as my conscience, keep me on the straight and narrow."

"Yeah, like you listen to anything I say." He'd removed all the pins now and began rearranging her hair to the way she usually wore it.

"I listen." Having styled her hair to his satisfaction, he stopped. "Good as new." He told her but his hands lingered there for a moment longer than they should have. "And for what it's worth, you were right about the patient".

"I don't care about him." She paused. "I did what he asked, you know. I didn't go behind his back and wait for the coma to do the biopsy. He wanted me to do it. I waited as long as I thought I could."

"I know."

"Then why do I feel so awful?"

"Because you care."

"Do you blame me?"

"No."

"Then why have you been punishing me, pushing me away?"

"Because that's what I do."

"You feel guilty too. If you hadn't sent him to that apartment he'd never have become sick."

"Someone had to go."

Cameron was about to reply when the bathroom door opened.

House looked over and stepped back from Cameron. "I wrote "out of order" on the door," he said to the middle-aged woman there.

"Yeah, but it also says "Ladies" and I'm desperate."

"So you'd use a toilet that doesn't work?"

"Right now I'd use a bucket," she said, heading for a stall.

"Janitors' closet is next door," he told her as she locked herself in.

"Come on," said Cameron, heading towards the door.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

House took the bottle of bourbon from his desk drawer and poured his first large measure.

"Little early," said Wilson, sitting opposite him.

"I'm off the clock. You want some?"

"I'm driving. So are you."

House poured him a drink anyway, albeit smaller than his own. "Eh, it's a hospital, gotta be a bed somewhere."

"What are we drinking to?"

"Do we need to drink to something?" he thought a moment. "Let's drink to… discovering the contents of Cameron's purse." He placed the purse on his desk.

"Where did you get that?"

"She left it here."

"Did it have a little note on it saying 'please look inside'?"

"No."

"She won't thank you."

"She won't know." He began bringing things out of the bag. "Makeup, wallet, ooh!" he threw something across the room. "Girlie stuff," he shook his head and shuddered theatrically.

"What are you hoping to find?"

"The meaning of life." He pulled a black object out. "Bingo, her day planner."

"House, that's private."

"Your point being?"

Wilson shook his head but didn't answer.

"Wow, lot of men in the address section. Peter, Robert, Harry. Oh," he said gleefully, "James, that wouldn't be you, would it?"

"It's a common name."

"It wouldn't surprise me, of ether of you. But I guess you're probably not needy enough for each other." House refilled his glass and looked thoughtful. "Would two people who need needy people work together? You can't be healthy if you only date people who need you, so maybe you two do have a shot."

House sat back in his chair and began flipping through the diary pages.

"I think I'll leave you to it. Have fun." Wilson rose and left. House waved by way of a goodbye as he pulled a photograph out of the day planner.

III

The next morning it took Cameron only a few seconds to realise exactly what House had done. Slumped over his desk, snoring lightly, a few of the items from her purse lay scattered around him.

"My god!"

House raised his head. "Too shrill," he croaked, squinting to see who had awoken him.

"How could you?" She stood with her hands on her hips. "Just because I forget my purse doesn't give you the right to go through my things. Don't you have any decency? Any respect for privacy at all?"

Sitting upright House shook his head to clear the fuzziness. "I regularly have you break into other people's houses, doesn't that tell you something?"

Cameron walked up to the desk, picked her purse up from the floor beside it and reached for an object on the desk. House snatched it away and looked at it again.

Cameron sighed and glared at him. "You had no right."

"That's true. But you are a liar."

"I've never lied to you."

"No? What about a lie of omission? You have a sister. Correction, had a sister." House pulled his pills out of his pocket and shook two into his hand.

"You're my boss, that does not give you the right to know every intimate detail of my life."

"How about if I were your boyfriend?" He swallowed the pills dry. "I wouldn't mind a coffee if you're offering." Cameron glared at him. He sighed. "If I can't trust you, I can't work with you. Simple as that." He stood up and walked through to the diagnostics room to put some coffee on.

"It's none of your business," she said, following him.

"Probably not, but you're going to tell me anyway."

Cameron crossed her arms over her chest and glared at his back.

"What did she have?" Cameron didn't answer so he looked at the picture again. "It has to be some type of cancer; her hair's short, much thinner than yours, the skin pale."

"Leukaemia. Can I have that back?" she held her hand out.

House gave her the picture. "She was very pretty," he said softly. Turning back to the coffee machine he asked. "How long?"

Cameron sat down, staring at the picture. "Diagnosed when she was five. She died when she was 17. Renal failure."

"How old were you?"

"17. We were fraternal twins."

House nodded. "That explains a few things."

Cameron looked over at him as he turned around and leaned against the wall.

"You think you've discovered how I tick?" she asked calmly. Almost too calmly. House studied her intently as she continued. "Well you're right. I didn't have a childhood. I had a job. I spent my childhood never having enough love from my parents because they didn't have the energy with Emily being ill. I didn't have dance lessons, or music lessons or karate lessons, there wasn't the time or money. I never got to rough-house or climb trees because Emily wasn't well enough to do it, too. They missed me playing lead in the school play because Em was rushed to the hospital. I washed her, cleaned up after her, played with her, read to her. I shaved my head every time she had chemo so when the kids laughed at her, she wasn't alone. When we both got a crush on Tim Davis, I pretended not to like him so he would take her to junior prom. And you know what? I never minded any of it, because she was the most wonderful person I've ever met." She had tears glistening in her eyes. "She was my best friend."

House swallowed. "I'm sorry."

"No, you're not. You're pleased. Now you think you know why I became a doctor, why I married a dying man, why I like you. But you're wrong. I didn't become a doctor to try to save my sister or make up for her death. I didn't marry my husband because he was sick and I don't like you because you're damaged. You think you can sum people up in a few sentences but life is more complicated than that."

She stood and went back into House's office, collected the rest of her things off his desk and left.

"Where are you going?" he called after her.

"Away from you."

III

By the time Chase came in, House had finished three cups of coffee and was feeling much better.

Surprised she wasn't in before him as usual, Chase asked, "Where's Cameron?"

"Sulking."

"What did you do?"

"Why do you assume it was me?"

Chase shrugged.

"You know," House continued, "you'd think you'd be more protective of someone you slept with."

"I slept with her, I didn't marry her."

"You're dying for a repeat performance, though. I can see it in the way you watch her when you think no one's looking. "

"I do not…"

"Thing is, she'd probably like it better if you stood up for her once in a while, backed her up. Chicks dig that."

"There's nothing between…"

"But that would be unprofessional, and we can't be biased, can we?"

"What's this about?"

House stood up. "You're covering my clinic duty," he told Chase as he headed for the door.

"Why, where are you going?"

"Hunting."

Chase stared after his boss, perplexed.

III

"God, you're predictable."

"Did my walking out not give you a hint I didn't want to see you?" She didn't turn around to face him.

"I don't do hints. Besides, if you didn't want me to find you, you wouldn't have hid somewhere so easy." House sat in the pew behind Cameron in the hospital chapel.

"I suppose you think I came here to mourn."

"No, I think you came here because you didn't expect I'd come here. First rule of hunting, understand the prey."

"And the second rule?"

"Don't wear day-glo."

Cameron was glad she had her back to him as she couldn't keep a smile from playing at her lips.

After a silence he asked, "Don't you want to correct me?"

"Not really."

"Sure you do. You want to let me know how wrong I am so I can learn a little humility."

Cameron smiled and turned around to face him. "I'm strong enough in myself that I don't need to explain my motives to you, and I know you well enough to realise you have no humility."

"That's why you wanna teach me some."

Cameron shook her head, smirking at him. "Sorry, but I don't." She stood up and walked towards the door. She paused before leaving. "And doesn't that just kill you?" she teased.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

House slowed as he came to his office and stopped before he would become visible. He cocked his head to better hear Cameron's conversation - at least her side of it.

"Yeah right, you just want me for the meds," she said lightly. "No, no, keep talking, I'm coming around here." … "You're on," House could visualise the smile she wore when she was that happy. "No, I might have to stay late, so I'll meet you there." Her next words she spoke slowly, like she was concentrating on something else. "Seven… thirty… Great. If you get there first, mine's a seven/seven." … "I work for House," she laughed. "Every day is a tough day."… "OK, great, see you later."

House walked into his office in time to see her putting something in her pocket. "Talking to yourself? Never a good sign."

"Eavesdropping?"

"Hey, it's my office."

"I'll leave you to enjoy it then. Your messages are on your desk."

"Where are you going?"

"Clinic."

Cameron left and House seated himself behind his desk. Taking a pencil, he pulled the pad on his desk towards him and began rubbing the pencil lightly over the pad.

"What is that, a coin rubbing? Even you can't be that bored," said Wilson, sitting down opposite him.

"No, coin rubbing would be juvenile. This is snooping."

"Much more grown up."

"Was there something you wanted?"

"Just came to see if you were busy tonight."

House finished rubbing the pencil over the pad. "I wasn't but I am now. How do you feel about a drink at," he squinted at the paper, "Ruby's, say seven forty-five?" he looked up expectantly.

Wilson sighed. "Are you even going to bother telling me what's going on?"

"Why would I? You'll only frown and tell me I'm a bad boy. Come to Ruby's tonight and you'll see for yourself, anyway."

He shook his head. "Fine, I'll be there."

III

Cameron was nervous as she walked in. She looked around. It was busy and it took a few moments to spot him at a table near the back.

He stood up and smiled as she came close.

"Sebastian," she hugged him. "It's good to see you."

"You too, you look great."

"Thank you."

"Sorry it's so busy in here, I didn't realise it would be. I think this was the last table."

"Don't worry." They sat down. "Before I forget," Cameron rummaged in her purse. "Your meds." She handed a paper bag over. "And please tell me you didn't give all the others away."

"Only what I hadn't taken by the time I left." Cameron looked doubtfully at him. He held three fingers up. "Scout's honour."

"I'll bet you made a cute boy scout," she teased.

"I was more a Dennis the Menace type."

"You?!"

"Oh yeah. Always into something I shouldn't be."

"I don't believe it."

"It's true. And I only asked you out tonight because I have an ulterior motive."

Cameron's smile slipped a little. "Oh?"

"Don't look at me like that, it's nothing bad. My brother's getting married this weekend, which is why I came back. I'm the best man."

Cameron looked confused. "And you need me, because he wants to make it a double wedding?"

"No." he laughed. "Well, actually, he'd be fine, his fiancé on the other hand, Clarissa… I don't think she'd like her thunder stolen by someone as pretty as you."

Cameron blushed. "So why am I here then?"

"Well, it's the maid of honour. It's Clarissa's sister and she's fourteen. Unless I have a date… Well, you know what's supposed to happen."

Cameron laughed. "You're worried about fending off a fourteen year-old girl?"

"Hey! She's very mature for her age, not to mention she has a brown belt in karate. I could be in serious trouble here."

They both laughed.

"So what do you say, will you go with me?"

"What a surprise seeing you two here."

Cameron looked up. "House!"

"I didn't know you drank here, Cameron." He pulled the chair out from beside Sebastian. "Don't mind if we join you, do you? It's a bit crowded in here and my leg is killing me."

Wilson sat next to Cameron murmuring, "Sorry about this."

House turned to Sebastian. "So, how many sick kids have I saved since you left?"

"You saved?"

"I saved your life, ergo, I saved their lives. It's a karmic thing."

"In that case, you've probably let a few million die in that time."

"Oh, so negative. You should really look at the positives in life."

"Look who's talking," said Cameron, glaring at House.

"I'm sorry," he said sweetly. "I'm sensing a little hostility. Did I interrupting something? Were you two lovebirds on a date?"

"Not at all," said Sebastian smoothly. "Just two friends enjoying a drink."

House looked condescendingly at Cameron. "I can't tell you how pleased that makes me."

"The date's not until Saturday," said Sebastian, smugly. "That way we don't need to get up for anything in the morning."

"Really? I'd have sworn Cameron was more of a third date kind of girl." He turned his gaze from Cameron and looked Sebastian in the eye.

"I guess that depends on who the date is."

"Ouch! Touché."

Cameron stood up. With scarcely concealed anger she said, "I think I've had enough testosterone for one night. Enjoy your evening."

As she walked away House looked to Wilson. "Was it something I said?"

House picked up the cocktail menu from the table and began to browse through it. Sebastian stood up beside him.

"I know you don't like me, Doctor House, but who your staff sees is none of your business."

House looked up. "Me? Have a problem with you?" he looked puzzled. "Where would you get an idea like that?"

Sebastian walked away. House looked back to his menu. Wilson shook his head and sighed.

"What?" asked House. "Not having fun?" Wilson glared at him. "I'll fix that." He hailed a passing waitress. "Two Black Deaths."

"What's in a Black Death?" Wilson asked.

"Dunno, but it sounds good."

III

House paused outside his building and looked at the dark windows. Not often but sometimes, he wished he could come home to someone. It would be nice, now and again, to see someone else's clutter around the place, to see lights on as he approached, to know someone gave a crap if he was too late or too drunk or too stoned one night.

Tonight he was neither late, nor drunk nor stoned. Wilson hadn't been impressed by his stunt, not that House had really expected him to be, but for the next half hour he alternately questioned House and dispensed unwanted advice. The only option had been to leave.

A part of House knew Wilson was right, he either had to have a relationship with Cameron or he had to let her go. What they had wasn't enough for either of them, but he couldn't let someone in. Not again. Equally, he couldn't see her happy with someone else. That would be torture.

He slid his key into the lock and opened the door, turning the lights on as he pushed it closed with his cane.

"How did you get in?"

"You… and Foreman. Between the two of you I know just about every trick there is."

House headed towards the kitchen. "Whatever it is can wait until tomorrow."

"No it can't. I can't do this any more, House. You don't want me but you don't want anyone else to have me. Why can't you let me be happy?"

"You wouldn't be happy with him."

"How do you know?"

"Because I know you."

"You think you know me."

House returned from the kitchen with two bottles of beer and sat beside her, handing her one.

"I don't think I know you. I do know you. And I know you would never be happy with him?"

"Why? Because he's not damaged or crippled or dying? Believe it or not, it is possible for me to like a healthy man." She glared at him. "It actually makes a nice change."

"That's not why you wouldn't be happy." House took a swig of his beer. "First of all, you're driven, you need to prove yourself. Why else would you apply for a job with someone notoriously difficult to work with, like me? Because I'm the best and you want to be the best. Second of all, you're smarter than he is. He didn't do nearly as well as you at med school. And finally, treating TB in Africa is boring. Same symptoms day in day out, same diagnosis, same treatment. If you'd wanted that you'd have become a family doctor, treating the sniffles and passing any interesting cases on to a specialist. No. You need someone who can challenge you, someone who can make you into the best doctor you can be."

"Someone like you?"

"That's not what I said."

"But it's what you meant."

"Drink your beer."

Cameron looked at the bottle like she hadn't seen it before. She took a sip and they sat in silence for a while. House picked up the TV remote and began flicking through the channels.

"I know why you do it," she said softly, staring at the bottle she was holding in her lap. House ignored her. "You're testing me. You want to know how much I can take before I leave, walk out on you." She was silent a moment. "I was wrong, you know. When I said I had only one evening, one chance with you. But you're wrong too. You think you have endless chances but you don't, because I won't be here forever. I will move on."

Cameron sat forward and placed her bottle on the table.

"Thanks for the drink." She made to get up but House placed his hand gently on her arm.

"You're not going anywhere," he said firmly.

Cameron didn't quite know how to respond, so she didn't.

House turned the TV up. "The Shining is coming on. I can't watch it alone."

Cameron found herself settling back down. She knew this had nothing to do with a film. Trouble was, she had no idea what it was about. She thought she understood a little of how Alice felt as she fell down the rabbit hole.

"Another beer?" House asked.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"Man! If Chase has said it was _that_ good I'd have done this months ago."

"Oh God," Cameron groaned.

"What?" asked House. "Not fun for you?"

"No, it's just… That was a really bad idea."

"Thought it was one of my better ideas, actually."

Cameron turned away, swung her legs off the side of the bed and buried her face in her hands. "House…"

"Greg."

"What?"

"We just slept together, you're sitting, naked, on the edge of my bed. I think it's okay to call me Greg at this point." He told her back.

"Sorry, habit."

"Turn around and talk to me."

Cameron pulled the covers over her torso as she turned to face him, sitting cross-legged on the bed, next to him.

"It's a little late for modesty."

Cameron glared at him.

"Oh, come on," he said, exasperated. "You've been chasing me for two years and now you've got what you wanted and you're having second thoughts?"

"No... I just… You're being glib."

"You thought it would all be hearts and flowers once we did it?"

"No, of course not. I just… don't think we did it for the right reasons."

"What are the right reasons?"

Cameron was silent.

"You think I'm marking my territory because TB guy is back?"

"Sebastian."

"Whatever."

Cameron sighed. "I don't know."

"So what are your reasons?"

"You know my reasons."

House chewed his lip. "Nope, I don't think you've ever actually answered why you like me."

"Do I need a reason?"

"No, but most people have them."

Cameron was silent.

House took her hand and she looked up at him. "I'm not being glib any more. I wanna know."

Cameron paused. "Because you're more than just the misanthrope you portray to the world. You do what you think is right, regardless of what people will think. You stand up for patients, you're tenacious, irascible, frustrating and brilliant. You hide behind this sneering mask of mockery but underneath you're just as vulnerable as everyone else, maybe more so. And despite what you say, part of you still wants to believe in the goodness of people. You wouldn't bother telling them the truth if you didn't think they could change."

House raised his eyebrows. "Maybe I just like being right?"

Cameron looked sadly out of the window. "Maybe you do," she said dejectedly. "I should go." She made to get up but once again, House grabbed her arm, not gently this time.

"Stop running away," he raised his voice to her.

"Stop being flippant," she retorted angrily.

"It's who I am."

"No, it's a part of your façade."

House released her arm. "We're going round in circles," he told her, getting out of bed himself. "Get dressed, I'll put some coffee on." He pulled on a robe and left her alone.

Cameron dressed and followed him out. She looked towards the door, wondering briefly if she could leave the apartment without him noticing.

"Don't even think about walking out," he yelled from the kitchen.

"What do you care?" she yelled back.

"I don't like cowards."

"You don't like anyone," she grouched.

Cameron stood in the kitchen doorway, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed. House placed her coffee on the table and sat down.

"Sit," he told her.

Cameron remained where she was.

"That wasn't a request."

She went and sat opposite him, her demeanour reminding him a little of a teenager who'd just been grounded.

"Talk to me."

"I seem to have done most of the talking so far." She reached out and took hold of her coffee, wrapping her hands around it as though for warmth and staring into its depths.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know, something. Anything." She looked up into his eyes. "Anything to reassure me that it meant to you even a little of what it meant to me."

"It meant something," he said somberly. "I just don't know what, yet."

Cameron shook her head. "Please don't tell me this was one of your experiments."

"It wasn't premeditated if that's what you mean."

The phone rang, but neither made a move to answer it. The beep sounded and Chase's voice cut in. "House, it's Chase. The hospital's been trying to reach Cameron for the last hour. She's not picking up at home and her mobile's going straight through to voicemail. If you hear from…"

House and Cameron both grabbed for the phone, House reached it first. "I'm here." He listened for a few moments, Cameron staring anxiously at him.

"Don't worry," he told Chase. "I know where to find her." He hung up and took a deep breath. "Your mother was admitted earlier tonight. She had an accident."

"Oh my God, is it serious?"

"Chase didn't know, they wouldn't tell him anything."

Cameron turned away, "I've got to get down there," she said rushing from the kitchen. She grabbed her purse from the bedroom but House was already standing in front of the door when she came out, blocking her exit.

"You're in no condition to drive."

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not, you're too worked up to drive."

"I don't have time to wait for a cab."

"Let me get dressed, I'll drive you." He headed back towards the bedroom. "Don't go out that door," he said, turning back and pointing his cane at her.

III

House pulled up outside the hospital and Cameron climbed off the motorcycle. She pulled the helmet off and handed it back to him.

"I… Thank you," she turned and went inside.

House stared after her. He should probably go in with her in case she needed someone. On the other hand, she hadn't asked him to and her mother was probably fine. Nothing more than a sprained wrist or something. Then again, when you'd slept with someone less than an hour ago, leaving like this wasn't exactly the done thing.

House sighed. He could go around like this for hours finding equally good reasons both to stay and to leave. In the end, there was only one important factor: did he want to stay?

House revved the engine and pulled away. He had no desire to be playing happy families at two am.

III

"You're early."

"And you haven't been home."

"I showered here." Cameron crossed her arms as she stood just inside the doorway. She couldn't have been further away from him and still be in his office.

"How's your mom?"

"Like you don't already know."

"How could I know?"

"By accessing the mainframe."

"But I don't have access to the mainframe. I'm just a lowly department head."

"True, but you bribe McPherson from IT with a case of single malt whiskey every time Cuddy changes her password."

"Uh oh! Busted." He shrugged. "I just thought you might prefer to tell me."

"She's awake now, she seems okay."

House scowled at her. "Sit down." He gestured to the chairs opposite his desk.

"I have clinic duty."

"The clinic doesn't open for another half hour. Sit."

Cameron sat.

"Have you slept at all?" he asked.

"No."

"Go home."

"I'm fine. Besides, I have clinic this morning," she reiterated.

"You're tired. Tired people make mistakes."

"I've stayed awake much longer than this before, and I haven't hurt anyone yet."

"Oh, that's right. When is Foreman coming back?"

Cameron sighed. "Stop it. I might have been tired, we all were, but it was a sound decision."

"It was unnecessary."

"It saved his life. Which wouldn't have needed saving if you hadn't sent him to the cop's apartment in the first place."

"So it's my fault?"

"It's nobody's fault. You're just hiding, as usual." Cameron leaned forward and rubbed her forehead. "I know you feel guilty about Foreman. I know that you like me. I know that under that antagonistic exterior is actually a pretty decent guy." She looked up at him. "Why are you so afraid of people finding that out?"

"Morning." Chase came in.

"Everybody's early today," House muttered.

"How's your mum?" asked Chase.

"She's okay. She fell down the stairs, hit her head and broke her leg. She was unconscious for a few hours but she's awake now. Luckily there doesn't seem to be any brain damage."

"Chase, you're covering Cameron's clinic hours this morning."

"What? Why?"

"Because her mother was admitted to hospital last night, she hasn't slept at all and I'm taking her home."

"I'm fine!" Cameron protested.

House stood up and pointed at Chase. "You, clinic. You," he pointed at Cameron, "follow me."

III

Considering he was disabled, House was cutting a fair pace towards the parking lot. Cameron was almost jogging to keep up.

"This isn't necessary. I'm fine. Really."

House stopped at his bike and turned to her. "Oh for God's sake, sing a different tune. I'm giving you time off. Boss approved time off. If you don't want to go to sleep, go see a movie, go shopping, have some fun, sit with your mom, anything. Just stop being such a goody two shoes."

"I am not…"

"Oh please! You don't do anything outside this hospital. You eat, sleep and work… And from the looks of you, not much of the eating."

"Oh, like your life is a whirlwind of socialising."

"We're not talking about me. I'm old, I'm a cripple. I've earned the right to sit at home and mope."

"You're not old. You're just miserable."

House climbed on the bike. "Are you coming?"

Cameron pulled the helmet on. "Take me to your place."

House looked at her like she'd just spoken Klingon. "You mean, after all your agonising, you actually want us to…"

She cut him off. "My car is at your house." She climbed on behind him.

"Right." House was glad she couldn't see his face.

III

Cameron climbed off the motorcycle and handed House the helmet. He wouldn't meet her eyes.

Cameron hesitated but decided she had to say something. "Look… I think we both know how I feel about you."

"I think the whole hospital does."

"Probably. I don't see any reason to hide it. I also think I know how you feel."

House began to respond but Cameron held her hand up.

"Don't." She took a deep breath. "Now you need to decide how you feel and what you want to do about it. You have my number if things go in my favour." She turned and walked over to her car. She glanced back as she got in, but House wasn't looking. He was pulling away.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

House was playing his Gameboy when Sebastian Charles knocked and came into his office.

"TB guy! To what do we owe the honour?"

"The nurses told me about Dr. Cameron's Mom."

"Are you hitting the staff up for money again?"

"I just popped in to say hi. Is she around?"

House paused the game and looked up. "Don't know." He stood, grabbed his cane and walked until he could see into the diagnostic room. "Nope." He took a Vicodin as he headed back to his desk. "She's not. Sorry." Picking the Gameboy up again, he resumed playing.

"Look, I don't know what went on between you guys, but it seems clear to me you two still have issues with each other."

"Issues?" House questioned.

"Only people who've been in a relationship can annoy each other as much as you two do. I like Allison, but I don't want to step on any toes. If you two aren't finished, then I'll bow out gracefully."

House continued playing the game. "Wow, what a guy."

"Can you put that down and give me a straight answer, please?"

House sighed, paused the game and looked up. "Straight answer, stay away from her."

"Because you still want her," Sebastian stated.

"Because she's too good for you."

Sebastian considered replying but House picked up the game again, so he left, more puzzled than ever.

III

Cameron was growing despondent. It had been six days since House had dropped her off at her car, but he hadn't said anything to her about 'that' night or about a relationship. He was completely normal in work, perhaps a little more snippy than usual, but with House it was hard to tell.

She'd been to the wedding with Sebastian and enjoyed herself, although she had to admit that there was no future with him. And not because he lived in Africa, but because she didn't feel for him what she felt for House. She had an idea she wouldn't feel like that with anyone until she got over House, and it was becoming clear he simply wasn't interested.

She'd been saved the awkward talk with Sebastian when he'd brought the subject up himself and bowed out gracefully. They both agreed it was better to remain friends.

She's gone to see her mom on Sunday and had been surprised to hear that House had been in to see her before she was released. Cameron wasn't sure what to make of that.

Monday night she came home to an empty apartment once again and headed straight for the freezer. She needed more comfort ice cream.

Her phone rang as she sat down on the sofa so she put the ice cream on the table and picked up the handset.

"Hello?"

"I have some ground rules. You either agree or all bets are off."

Cameron couldn't help the broad smile that spread across her face. She was glad House couldn't see her right now as she replied, as calmly as possible. "Fire away. I'll see if your terms are acceptable."

"Number one: no one at work is to know, so no blabbing to Foreman, Chase or Cuddy. At least for now."

"But you can tell Wilson?"

"I tell Wilson everything. Almost."

"Second?"

"No trying to change me. I will not give up the Vicodin, the drinking or the cigars. You will not heal me so don't even try."

"Understood. Three?"

"You will have hot sex with me in my office at least once a week."

"It has glass walls!"

"All the more exciting, don't you think? And I want sex in the MRI machine. I just always wondered if it was possible."

Cameron laughed. "Okay. Anymore?"

"I reserve the right to amend the above conditions whenever I feel like it. Do we have a deal?"

Cameron held off answering for as long as she could but it was only a moment or two before she caved. "It's a deal."

"Good. Now, what are your plans for this evening?"

Her doorbell rang. "Just a sec, there's someone at the door, but as long as it's just a Jehovah's Witness, I have no plans."

She opened the door to see House standing there. He was smiling, almost warmly at her.

"Sorry," she said into the phone as she stared into his eyes. "I think I might be busy tonight."

The End


End file.
